{"id":72016,"date":"2021-08-16T18:52:20","date_gmt":"2021-08-16T18:52:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/\/\/uncategorized\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change"},"modified":"2021-11-22T01:18:48","modified_gmt":"2021-11-22T06:18:48","slug":"how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Form Tough Identities That Propel Behavioral Change"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>We praise what matters. In a famous study, Stanford psychologist <a href=\"https:\/\/news.stanford.edu\/news\/2007\/february7\/dweck-020707.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-lasso-id=\"86961\">Carol Dweck<\/a> found that students were far more likely to persevere through challenging problems and bring those problems home to work on more when they received praise for working hard rather than being <em>smart<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>We praise what matters. In a famous study, Stanford psychologist <a href=\"https:\/\/news.stanford.edu\/news\/2007\/february7\/dweck-020707.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-lasso-id=\"86962\">Carol Dweck<\/a> found that students were far more likely to persevere through challenging problems and bring those problems home to work on more when they received praise for working hard rather than being <em>smart<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>Praising effort produced a <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/tapping-into-the-power-of-identity-is-the-secret-to-sustainable-fitness\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86963\">hard-working identity<\/a> that fueled people to persist through <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/5-fitness-challenges-that-will-strengthen-body-and-mind\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86964\">difficult challenges<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>By contrast, praising fixed traits like intelligence produced a fragile identity where students avoided challenges because they worried that they would no longer look smart if they struggled.<\/p>\n<p>Similarly, a <a href=\"https:\/\/hbr.org\/2013\/07\/be-careful-how-you-praise-peop\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-lasso-id=\"86965\">London Business School study<\/a> found that those receiving praise for their decision-making skills were 40% more likely to stick with bad hires.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Even more, those receiving praise for their creativity were more likely not to escalate their commitment to bad hires<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>Praising creativity made workers more open and adaptive, while praising decision-making skills made people rationalize why their decisions must be right.<\/p>\n<p><strong>These examples show that certain identities tend to cage people and limit their options, while others are the springboard to adaptability and success<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ve found <em>toughness<\/em> to be the latter.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"toughness-creates-motivation-and-willpower\">Toughness Creates Motivation and Willpower<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Toughness was among the most important values instilled in my youth<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>My father told stories of tough people, glorified tough movie characters, and praised any behavior he deemed tough. Thus, I wanted to be tough.<\/p>\n<p>As I got older, I developed a correlation between toughness and <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/flexibility-is-like-any-other-discipline-it-takes-discipline\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86966\">discipline<\/a> and between toughness and exercise. Missing a planned workout or even failing to study enough became a form of wimping out.<\/p>\n<p><strong>There are many pitfalls to rigid, overly tough machismo, but the toughness identity is the most powerful when <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/train-toughness-before-its-too-late\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86967\">well defined<\/a> and balanced by other values<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Toughness <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/being-fit-isnt-easy-for-anybody-even-the-pros\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86968\">creates motivation<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/dont-be-a-wimp-train-your-willpower\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86969\">willpower<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>When you value toughness, health goals are just a trade.<\/li>\n<li>Tough people will trade a few minutes of discomfort to be stronger, healthier, more empowered people.<\/li>\n<li>You can interpret almost any desired behavior in terms of toughness.<\/li>\n<li>You know that that <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/slay-the-dragon-techniques-to-conquer-fear\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86970\">cold shower<\/a> has benefits and will leave you feeling better all day. So don\u2019t wimp out.<\/li>\n<li>You know that <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/the-chief-habit-your-ten-minute-morning-fitness-plan\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86971\">10-minute morning movement<\/a> habit primes you for a better, more active day.<\/li>\n<li>Tough people do the work, even when they don\u2019t feel like it.<\/li>\n<li>You know that an occasional <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/a-practical-guide-to-intermittent-fasting\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86972\">intermittent fast<\/a> can help you develop a better relationship with hunger.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Then what is stopping you other than your unwillingness to <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/when-healthy-habit-becomes-passionless-routine\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86973\">withstand short-term discomfort<\/a> for a more significant cause? Just convert your goals into the currency of toughness, and then following through becomes the only behavior that makes sense.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Perhaps this is why every culture, until very recently, placed a lot of value on toughness<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>There was no other option. The work that society depended upon required a population willing to persist through discomfort on behalf of a greater cause. But advanced modern cultures seem to be wholly oriented around the effort to make life as comfortable as possible.<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019ve removed any expectation of toughness only to find that people avoid the actions and experiences essential to living well without it. Without a capacity to intentionally endure discomforts, <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/why-gyms-are-coming-back-more-essential-than-ever\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86974\">life becomes superficial<\/a> and minor pains are amplified in proportion to our growing sensitivity.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Whether you buy into the power of toughness or not, it shows how you can use your values to stoke motivation<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>All you have to do is convert your desired behavior into the language of what you value. Then not following through is a threat to an identity that you cherish.<\/p>\n<p><strong>For example<\/strong>:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>If you highly value being a creative person, then any health or fitness goal is just an opportunity for you to figure out how to <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/you-are-the-solution-to-your-own-situation\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86975\">manipulate your situation<\/a> to succeed.<\/li>\n<li>If you value being a good parent, the best way to commit to your health and fitness goals is to remember that your kids aren\u2019t likely to be healthy unless you are first.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/strong-parents-strong-kids\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86976\">Strong parents<\/a> make strong kids.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"the-power-of-heuristics-to-motivate-behavior\">The Power of Heuristics to Motivate Behavior<\/h2>\n<p>Heuristics, like this one, are another powerful tool that can help groups and individuals cultivate more empowering identities and clarify the behaviors you want to associate with those identities.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>As <a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Daniel-Coyle\/e\/B001IQWPIA\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-lasso-id=\"86977\">Daniel Coyle<\/a> explains in his book, <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Culture-Code-Secrets-Highly-Successful\/dp\/0525492461\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-lasso-id=\"86978\">The Culture Code<\/a><\/em>, successful groups \u201cfocus on creating priorities, naming keystone behaviors, and flooding the environment with heuristics that link the two.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>His book is full of these. Here are some of my favorites.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heuristics of the New Zealand All Blacks rugby team<\/strong>:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cIf you\u2019re not growing anywhere, you\u2019re not going anywhere.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cLeaving the jersey in a better place.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cPressure is a privilege.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cIt\u2019s an honor, not a job.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Heuristics of KIPP charter schools<\/strong>:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cRead, baby, read.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cEverything is earned.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cKIPPsters do the right thing when no one is watching.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cNo shortcuts\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>To create <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-tough-is-your-mind\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86979\">behavioral change<\/a>, I recommend borrowing a couple of popular heuristics or starting your own.<\/p>\n<p><strong>For example, I still frequently think of my high-school football coach\u2019s saying: 99% is a wimp<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>It keeps me from making concessions whenever I\u2019m not in the mood to stay disciplined.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Other effective toughness-related heuristics include<\/strong>:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Tough times don\u2019t last. Tough people do.<\/li>\n<li>When the going gets tough, the tough get going.<\/li>\n<li>What doesn\u2019t kill you makes you stronger.<\/li>\n<li>\u201cDiscipline equals freedom.\u201d &#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/jockopodcast.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-lasso-id=\"86980\">Jocko Willink<\/a>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Heuristics have a way of being overly-generalized, overly-romanticized, and incredibly corny<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>They are the sort of thing you see on a ten-year-old child\u2019s shirt.<\/p>\n<p>But the cultures and people who lean into them and integrate them into their daily lives tend to be far better at <a href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/overcome-your-lack-of-motivation-the-right-way\/\" data-lasso-id=\"86981\">following through on the behaviors that matter<\/a> to them. So who cares if you look cheesy being an adult who latches onto tough sayings.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Your actions will speak far louder than these words<\/strong>.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We praise what matters. In a famous study, Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck found that students were far more likely to persevere through challenging problems and bring those problems home to work on more when they received praise for working hard rather than being smart. We praise what matters. In a famous study, Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck found that&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":72017,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"limit_modified_date":"","last_modified_date":"","_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[4642],"tags":[4135],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Form Tough Identities That Propel Behavioral Change - Breaking Muscle<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Form Tough Identities That Propel Behavioral Change - Breaking Muscle\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"We praise what matters. In a famous study, Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck found that students were far more likely to persevere through challenging problems and bring those problems home to work on more when they received praise for working hard rather than being smart. We praise what matters. In a famous study, Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck found that...\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Breaking Muscle\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/breakingmuscle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-08-16T18:52:20+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-11-22T06:18:48+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/brutalstrength.jpeg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1200\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"799\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Shane Trotter\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@BreakingMuscle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@BreakingMuscle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Shane Trotter\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Shane Trotter\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/#\/schema\/person\/8dc924a2f4f6162496436664b1b39d80\"},\"headline\":\"How to Form Tough Identities That Propel Behavioral Change\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-08-16T18:52:20+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-11-22T06:18:48+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/\"},\"wordCount\":1004,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"Lifestyle Behaviors\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Fitness\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/breakingmuscle.com\/how-to-form-tough-identities-that-propel-behavioral-change\/\",\"name\":\"How to Form Tough Identities That Propel Behavioral Change - 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In a famous study, Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck found that students were far more likely to persevere through challenging problems and bring those problems home to work on more when they received praise for working hard rather than being smart. We praise what matters. 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